This poem was written in what was probably the darkest few months of my life, when I thought my life was over and that depression had taken everything from me. But thanks be to God, who showed me that my life IS worth living and that it was not the end for me. Thanks be to Him who sent people who didn't walk away, who didn't give up, who never stopped praying, never stopped texting to check on me, and who wouldn't leave me alone until they knew I was okay. You all literally saved my life.
So, to all who read this: Never give up, never let those thoughts and those emotions dictate what you do. Because it does end, and the pain won't last forever. Hold on tight because you are loved and important and beautiful and amazing.
So, to all who read this: Never give up, never let those thoughts and those emotions dictate what you do. Because it does end, and the pain won't last forever. Hold on tight because you are loved and important and beautiful and amazing.
One and Only
Hannah Rollett
It’s black and cold in this tiny room
Where I lay on my rock hard bed
Tears ceaselessly leave my red, tired eyes
Dampening the pillow that’s meant to comfort
I don’t hear you. I don’t see you.
Lonely darkness overtakes me
Ensnares a soul that once exuded life
And replaces it with mortality
Your limp body dangles from nails
Violent earthquakes shake the earth
Thick clouds obscure my vision
Are you really my Savior?
I needed you today, but you weren’t here
When they said I wasn’t good enough
And I believed every word
I believed my life wasn’t worth living
They say you’re my one and only Savior
The one to whom my eyes look
When the stormy seas engulf me in fear
And my heart threatens to burst from the pain
But where are you now?
As the knife pierces my pink flesh
Crimson blood oozing from my veins
Mingling with the torrents of tears from my eyes
Yet in the blood I see a reflection
A remembrance of a crimson stream
That gushes from your speared side
As you hang from that wooden cross
When you cried out in heartbreak
In utter abandonment and terror
My God, why have you forsaken me?
Those words that escape my very lips now.
Do you hear me? Can you see me?
Up there, on that wooden cross
Where a thorny crown resides on your head
And living breath has left your lungs.
I’ve waited three days. Only silence
Permeates these walls where I hide in a corner
Hoping, praying for an escape
From these thoughts that haunt my heart
But as I tremble in shame, I remember
That trembling rock that rolled away
Flooding the tomb with life
Restoring vitality to dry and withering bones
Now I feel it. Do I dare to believe it?
The small, aching hope inside my chest
Longing for life, longing for healing
Catching a glimmer of glorious light
The blackness of midnight enshrouding my soul
Is illuminated by a brilliant ray of sun
And another and another and another
Until the darkness disappears from my sight
The room around me is overwhelmed with light
That same brilliant radiance that illuminated
Your risen body, robed in white
Glowing like the sun overtaking the night
It rushes in like a torrent of grace
Gentle love pouring from your presence
Captivating the pain that captivated my mind
Healing those words that left so many scars
Now I know, now I understand
You do hear me, you do see me
You are my one and only Savior
And you’ve been right here all along
